The White Oprah Prepares You for Winter

We have a major snowstorm headed our way. It should reach us by tomorrow evening and they are saying we should get 8-13 inches of snow and ice. That is a bunch for around here. So tomorrow run right out to your local shoe store (I know Shoe Carnival carries these) and pick up a pair of Yaktrax. I love the person that invented these! You will never ever fall on ice or snow again. As you can see from the photo they strap on around your shoes. It can be tennis shoes or snow boots. These things have steel coils that get you locked into the ice or snow and won't let you slip. They say you can even go for a run with these (The White Oprah does not condone running anywhere for anything...not even for a brownie).

I wish these had been available back when I was a sophomore in college. I had just finished my International Business course and was heading down to my car. To get to my car I had to walk down 3 flights of ice covered steps. They had railings which I clung to for dear life and made it to the parking lot. Having survived near death on the stairs I was feeling cocky. The parking lot looked like a professional hockey ice rink. Solid ice everywhere. Still I had defeated the stairs so I was feeling good.

I took about 3 steps onto the parking lot and fell. I fell on an incline and began to slide. Next thing I know I am underneath a car looking up at the axle. There are people watching. Not offering help of course, just watching what my next move would be. Crying came to mind, I was fairly certain my ass had smashed my pinkie finger and it would never work again. So, I reached out with both hands and pulled myself out from underneath the car using the bumper, like a mechanic. My head hit my backpack that had somehow come off of me during my slide. I used the bumper of that car to pull myself up to a standing position and walked as carefully as I could to my car. I got in and took a look at myself. My jeans were torn, I was wet, dirty and miserable. There was blood gushing from my pinkie. Lovely.

I did not want to go back to class for about a week. I was certain I would be recognized and would hear the shouts of, "Hey there's the human hockey puck! She shoots she scoresssssss!" Luckily, I didn't hear much about it, but to this day I have a horrible fear of walking on ice or snow. I have been know to grab onto 80 year old grandmothers to support me walking across ice. I figure if she falls and breaks a hip no one will miss her. She does very little to contribute to society these days.

Take it from me, Yaktrax are the bomb...go get you a pair before this storm hits or you might be sorry!!!